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pop'n music 11 - Yima

madamluna in wvba_lockerroom

[REMATCH] From Russia With Rage Pt. 2: Super Macho Man vs. Soda Popinski!

It was only last week that Super Macho Man suffered a crushing defeat at the hands of Soda Popinski! Talk about a nuclear reaction--he's been training harder than ever and has declared a rematch against the Russian rumbler! Popinski's riding high on the adoration of the crowd, but you know Macho's not going to quit until he wins it all back! Tune in at 9:30PM EST for the explosive rematch between the Blue Crush and the Red Cyclone! (Hey, are we allowed to say "Red Cyclone?" Is that trademarked?)


releasethebogus vs. drunkpop
Ranking: World Circuit #1 ♦ World Circuit #3
Record: 35-2 (29 KO) ♦ 35-2 (25 KO)
Height: 6'4" ♦ 6'6"
Weight: 242 lbs ♦ 237 lbs
Age: "27" ♦ 35
From: Hollywood, California, United States ♦ Moscow, Russia

Comments

*rummaging around in Popinski's locker before the bout, switching out some of the bottles in his soda case*

(Heh heh...dude won't even know what hit him! This'll teach him for drinkin' during the fight...if he's gonna cheat, I'm just gonna cheat back! Phew, lugging around all this regular, non-nuclear Fanta's a drag...)

*hears a door slam and, spooked, runs back over to his locker and hides about four or five of Popinski's bottles in there*

Aw man, I guess the fight's gonna start any minute...well, that'll give him a kick! Heh heh...*grins as he throws a towel around his neck, locks his locker and walks out to the ring* This is gonna be great!
[Retcon: it's Red Bull now, just trust me on this one]
*exits the showers, billowing cloud of steam shuffling out from behind him like dry ice at a cheesy party, he's already donning his signature blood red speedoes, and is exceptionally shiny tonight*

Ahh good i am refreshed and ready for fighting my victory number two!!! ha ha ha

*opens his locker to retrieve his gloves and swings them over his shoulder, taking one last look at his mustache' in his locker's mirror he grabs his 6-pack of glowing drink... but oddly it isn't glowing. Soda doesn't notice like his internal narrative does, though, and he exits the locker room and out onto the stage*

[ROUND 1]

*Super Macho Man struts into the ring, showing off his tanned body (a little lighter than usual, since he hasn't shown his face in public much lately) and bulging muscles* Yeah, baby! Whooo! Back in the ring, chumps! Eat that!

*shows off a little bit, trying to tune out the vague sound of booing in the crowds, and knocks his gloves together* Hmph...c'mon, Soda, let's do this! *puts his dukes up and gets into his fighting stance*
*On the other side of the ring there is a deep monotone laughter* ha ha ha *Soda appears with the crowd roaring around him as he makes his way onto the ring. He chucks his many cases of glowing drink onto the fighting arena, including the 6 pack of fake drinks [without knowing!]*

so now it is time to prove your cheeseburning ways only destroy the boxers body!

*He punches his fists together, and cracks his neck.*

I AM READY FOR YOU SUPER MACHO MAN GIVE IT YOUR BEST!
*grin* (Heh heh...oh man, I can't WAIT! This is gonna be sweet, sweet, fridge-chilled revenge...)

Yeah, well, I cut down on the food and drinks, dude...but you're gonna get the PUNCH! *starts out with a hard right hook* I'm gonna wipe that stupid mustache right off your face!
Cut down??? what about those snickers ha ha ha

*He readies a block but expected it from the left, the right hook hits him square in the jaw* G-GUH! *He staggers back only for a brief second to spin around and retaliate low*

ha ha ha!!!
Snickers?!! *turns red* Listen man, I dumped most of those ou--UGH! *takes it in the stomach and stumbles back a little*

*shakes his head and tries to keep himself together* (C'mon, you can't let him do this to you, dude! Don't get mad, get even!) *eschews the trash talk as he focuses, letting out a flurry of jabs*
*Watches the fuming Super Macho Man try and aim straight, he blocks the first two jabs easily. The third, not so much.*

OOF--!

*His large frame juts back, shakes the ring, Soda laughs to himself and takes a step back*

I am feeling a bit thirsty my friend!

*He starts to drink the fake!Glowing Drink - and isn't disturbed! He gleefully downs the beverage in a fell swoop.* Ahh! yes exactly what I - I... I... i...



*There is a deep squeaming billowing noise, one unlike Soda has ever felt or heard, and it was coming from inside him! A hot red flushes his face and his heartbeat increases.* (T-t-this has not happened b-before... w-w-what the...) *His eyes, now bloodshot and intense. Soda see's better, percieves better, feels stronger!!!*

HAHAHAHA! Now, SUPER MACHO MAN! YOU WILL FEEL THE WRATH THAT COMES FROM THE COLD ICY HEAVENS, feel, deeply, for Marzanna will coup her loses and reclaim her frozen throne!

*He punches, almost leaps, the attacks fast and strong - maybe this drink was a bad idea after all...*
!!! Wh-whoa!! *tries to messily put up a defense and block Soda's attacks, but is caught off guard and is knocked around easily* Ooof! Oof, dude!

*wobbles back a little, catching himself on the ropes* (Ugh, what the hell! He's supposed to be...doing something that isn't this! That was just regular Red Bull, I picked it up at the 7-11 like fifteen minutes ago!)

*growls and gets back to his feet* Well, looks like I just gotta ride it out...come on, hit me with your best shot!
Now, now Sub-Macho Man, you can't ride this out! I am NOT like one of your SILLY AMERICAN SURFING WAVES! Ha ha ha!!!
*a variation of his usual launching attack, instead of alternating hooks are now single-sided powerful blows*

ha, HA, HA!

*blocked, blocked, BLOCKED?!* (G-Guh... this is impossible. Why would he hold off!? I WANT A FIGHT!) *Throws yet another flurry of swings, almost hap-hazardly*

*his vision start to blur...*
*grins as he watches Soda start to wobble and throw his punches haphazardly* (Well, well, how about that? Looks like my plan didn't backfire after all...awesome!)

*takes advantage of Soda's disorientation and steps in to deal a tightly controlled, but powerful, left-right-left combo* (This is tempting, but I can't wail on him just yet...not until I know he's not gonna get back up!)
*A bare-miss, whap, whap, WHAM!* (Nngngh!) *Macho Man's controlled punches hit the spot, Soda's stomach now filled with a tainted liquid isn't holding him up as he's used to it*

*his vision blurs more...*

ha ha ha you are shinier than used to macho man maybe it's time i stop holding myself back!

*He shakes his head, his mind back to it's usual muddle. His attacks steady and he aims right a slow but powerful right hook for Super Macho Man's face!*
*stares intently, focusing as hard as he can* (Come on, dude, don't mess this up! You're SUPER MACHO MAN... You didn't get to the top of the World Circuit for nothing!)

*watches Soda as he launches his heavy hook, then steps forward and hooks his fist hard into Soda's face, hitting him out of his attack and sending him spinning!*
wha--!?

*the large frame spins round and round, so are the stars! Soda hits the mat like a bag of sand*

1... 2... 3...

(g-give me... s-strength!) *he reaches... somehow into a secret compartment in his speedoes, and pulls out a drink... a legitimally GLOWING drink!* (mmm... yes... YES!)

4... 5... *He kicks the mat, and almost the Ref, sending the rest of his body standing up straight. Soda laughs to himself a hoarsy laugh and readies once again*

ha ha ha no more cheap tricks macho man i can smell you!!!

*He flashes red, a series of powerful right-and-left jabs aimed right at Super Macho Man's gut!*
*Super Macho Man's so happy about his awesome maneuver, he almost doesn't mind getting clocked in the stomach, especially since the three minute round is starting to wind down. He steps back and takes it easy, recovering right as the round ends.*

DING!

*flops down in his chair in his corner, beaming and grabbing a bottle of water* Oh man, oh man...*turns back, leaning with his arm over the ropes, and waves out to the Super Macho Man contingent, who are starting to get their morale back* Yeah, you see that out there, dudes and dudettes? Soak it in, babes! *airfist* I'm not done yet!

*glares over at Soda Pop, grinning* (Heh heh...he's still got five more of those fakes to go through, too!)
*King Hippo has been witnessing the fight from the loading area in back, the only place he can be comfortably seated. But now he approaches ringside, to speak with Super Macho Man.*

Omp Gomp. Gom Bromont. Urgromponomt!

*He stares at Macho Man questioningly. He pauses, and realizes he forgot to bring his interpreter. The hastily scrawled note he gives Macho reads as follows:*

"Sez victor from fladder of Oppoponax. BE Aggregarious."

*He looks at the packed crowds, hoping his interpreter is nearby.*
Uh...you tryin' to tell me somethin', dude? *glances at the note* Ohhh, I get it. Be aggressive, right? *grins, punches the air a couple times* No need to worry about that, Hippo! I got this fight all locked up. I'll tank this twerp like a sack of kittens...because I never lose!
*King Hippo nods, but then stops and looks horrified.*

GRURURALT! GOMP BARLRARM|

*He shakes a fist angrily, shakes his head sadly, and goes to sit back down. An exact translation is not forthcoming it seems, but he's conveyed the idea that he's not going to root for a kitten puncher. You monster. He's probably going back to his seat to make a generous donation to the ASPCA.*
hhmpt... this isn't over... *Growls Soda towards Super Macho Man, as he takes his seat in his corner.* (there was something not being right about drink...) *Soda grabs one of his drinks, unknowningly a fake one, opens the bottle and gives it a sniff... then he downs it in a swift gulp.*

!!!!
*Hondo, at ringside witnessing the battle, notices something odd about Popinski. He certainly was not bursting with energy as he usually is after a gulp of his glowing concoctions. He raised a thick brow. Something seemed off.*

"Is something troubling you, Soda-sama? You don't seem at the top of your game today." *He asks politely, folding his arms.*
*Hondo had just finished his sentence to Popinski when Aran arrived on the scene. And what the Irishman said did not exactly put Hondo's worries at ease.*

"Preparations? What prepa- And he's gone."

*Hondo was not exactly amused by Aran's sudden appearance, now suspected of foul play by the browed boxer. However, with Popinski suddenly not doing so well, it seemed Macho Man may not be playing with all of his chips on the table either.

Looks like he would just have to see how all of this plays out

From a safe, safe distance.*

*Turns to see Aran with a smug grin on his face* oh hello red head friend you are do--- *Watches as Aran walks away, not seeing or hearing Honda at first* HEY WHERE YOU ARE GOING?

*Spots Honda standing next to him* hey my sake drinking friend! thank you for the concern... i think there is something wrong with my drink...
"Your drink?" *Honda inspects Soda's bottles. Noticing that they were not glowing like they usually did.*

"... Are you drinking a different brand of 'soda'? Some of your bottles are not glowing as they usually do."
[ROUND 2]

are you ready yet macho man or are you still rubbing oil on your body ha ha ha

*Standing proudly, the still slightly sluggish Soda gobbles down yet another drink, unknowing if it is the right one or not - he seems alright for now, though*

i have waiting long enough now i will CRUSH YOU!!!

*He flings his bottle into the stands.*
Dude, I was born ready! *swaggers into the ring and keeps a close eye on Soda* (I can't tell if this is a good drink or a bad drink...guess I'll just have to watch and see!)

*keeps his gloves up, ready to block or dodge--or go in for the kill, whichever comes first*
*He stumbles forward for a quick right jab to the stomach* (Oog, I don't feel very good...) *His punch misses! Super Macho Man lightly steps to the back and lunges forward! Shaking his head, Soda goes in for a block but instead takes one in the jaw*

AAUUGH! what is WRONG?! *He roars into the crowd, obviously as confused as they are! He attempts yet another strong jab, aiming high this time!*
Oof! *moves back, but is clipped on the chin by Soda's jab* Heh heh...*rubs his chin* What's the matter, buddy? Looks like you're not on your game tonight!

*ducks another high jab and moves in, aiming a low punch into Soda's gut* Ha! Get ready to feel the burn!
oof! OOF! NNGHGHRRAHHH!!!
*The lack of his fighting preformance takes over him, Soda is now fuming angry. He needs energy! A rather peculiar glow emits from the fizzy bottle he extracts, and gulps it down faster than usual...*

heh... heh heh heh... HEH HEH HEH! YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

*That frightening look again! Soda cackles with rage. He begins throwing haphazard but powerful punches to his opponent - all hard right hooks!*
Oof! Ugh, hey--dude, no!! *finds that he can't block quickly enough, and takes the body blows hard in the stomach* Uuurgh...oof...

Oh man, now I'm mad! You're askin' for it this time, rat! *lets loose with a hard left hook* (C'mon, c'mon! That's it buddy, tire yourself out! I've got a reeeal surprise for you!)
HA HA HA PERUN'S GRACE BEFALLS ME!!!

*The left hook is blocked - by a leg? Defying gravity and the boxing rulebook Soda kicks up his leg and his calf takes the blow, but it also spins him 'round, right round, baby - right round.*

nnnghghgnnn... (H-h-hurf!) *Sweat on his brow, and now feeling sick, Soda attempts yet another powerful punch! Alas, the sugar-rush of the false glowing drink has left Soda's body gasping for proper liquid satisfaction, and he lurches forward with a pitiful display of a right jab...*
*a wide grin spreads over Super Macho Man's face as he watches Soda first spin, then lurch in an attempt to jab him in the face* Is that the best you got, big guy? If you're gonna take away all my fans, you gotta be able to put on a show, dude!

*Super Macho Man steps back, and--pulls out his famous sunglasses! He poses for the crowd as his fans go wild! The cameras flash! His bling glitters! And he pronounces that famous phrase--*

SUPER...

MACHO...

MAN!!

*with the fury of one hundred wipeouts, Super Macho Man lets out a tidal wave of Super Spinning Punches!*
!!! *There was a lack of a response, Soda in a jittered fury attempted to block most of the million punches he saw coming at him, a few he succeeded, a bunch he did not. He took some straight in his jaw, knocking his head back with each sucessful blow! ... While the crowd only saw the three signature punches...*

nnghhgnghh... (is... is it over... over now?) *Soda felt the air around him with his gloves, he seemed to be standing still! Lights flashing around him, groggily, he makes out Super Macho Man posing in front of him. In amazement he laughs! He survived!* (i am alive ha ha ha!) He reaches back to retain some glowing goodness when something creaks and rustles towards him in a soft whistle---*



*The banner Aran planted earlier - BACKFIRES! Soda hits the ground hard*

"1... 2... 3... 4... *Nope, he's not getting up*5... 6... 7... 8... *Not a drink within grasp*9... 10! KO! It's over, it's OVER!"

YEAH BOYEEEE

YEAH!! YEAH~!!! *Super Macho Man jumps up, ecstatic, raising his arms to the roof in sheer joyous victory, raising the referee up with them* THAT'S HOW WE DO IT IN AMERICA, BABY!

*grins as flowers, underwear etc. land in the ring, waves at his fans blissfully* Heh, you know I do it all for you guys! (And for the sake of my record...) *chuckles, throwing a towel around his neck and flexing* Looks like this is one Soda that's gone flat, dudes and dudettes!

And now if you'll excuse me...I got a lotta autographs to sign! Later, folks...*continues waving to his fans as he puts his sunglasses back on and exits the ring*

Re: Want this autograph, Yank?

*rooting through his locker* Huh? Sure thing, guess I don't mind...(hey, there's my instant tan! I was wondering where I'd left that stuff!) *turns around to face Aran, holding up the can of booby-trapped instant tan (it looks like it'll burst at any second!)*

Re: Want this autograph, Yank?

HAHAHAHA! Hahahaha, oh man, blue is your color! Talk about a photo op, dude! *pulls out his camera and snaps a couple pictures as Aran Ryan runs away to the showers*

*grabs his towel and his surfboard and heads out to Venice for a celebratory beach party, laughing the whole way* Hahaha! Oh man, wait 'til I tell all the chicks! Aran Ryan lettin' his buddy down and gettin' a faceful of spray paint...and I didn't even have to lift a finger! Hahaha, man oh man oh man...
World Circuit

August 2009

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